The Little Things

Being missed is a message to you saying that you were able to leave a lasting impression on people. You made an impact big enough on someone else's life that they can feel the difference when you’re not there. You left with a bundle of assets that made you stand out. You made a difference. Sometimes, it’s a difference for people that you didn’t even know you effected. Sometimes, you’re unaware until you do something that pushes them to tell you. And other times, well, other times you just don’t know. Whoever you are, whatever you do, and however you’re feeling, it may just add to your day to know that to someone in this world, you’re making an impact.
Add a few things to your to-do list; things like smiling at someone, helping someone else out, holding a door, offering a few words of wisdom, complimenting five people honestly and with meaning - all of these things that may seem so insignificant to you, but huge to another.
When that other person goes home at night, and someone asks them how their day was, they will have more to say than just, “fine,” and you gave them those extra words. Making a difference for others, makes a difference for you.
We all love to have our days made.
A lot of times, finding happiness for yourself means creating happiness for someone else - hence the post about making other's days a little brighter. Seeing affects of your words reflecting positively back through others really heightens your emotions, and can put you in the greatest of moods. The spreading of positivity is the essence of creating a happier you. In fact, the more people demonstrating an optimistic attitude, the more likely you will too.
We have a tendency to reflect the emotions of others around us. I'm sure you know the saying, "You are who you surround yourself with." That includes actions as well as feelings.
A positive, light-hearted group of friends is the best solution for a bad attitude. When you spend enough time around them, you begin to channel the same emotions, and your attitude begins reflecting their own. Though you never want to be a "follower," honestly feeling happy because another person's attitude had the ability to change your day, is a great thing.

"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things."
-Robert Brault

Sources:
http://en.thinkexist.com/

"no."

With each day you create a changing future. Think about it. During every day, you make these decisions. Choices. What you decide to put in your coffee, which muffin you bought at the bakery, how long it took you to get to wherever you were going.. they all make some sort of difference, whether it be the amount of creamer making you gain another two pounds, or deciding to grab the chocolate muffin instead of the bran one. As I brought this to my own attention, it made me think that while in between making those little decision, big ones are placed within my day without my knowledge. Each day we chose a path for ourselves, the new direction in which we take in our journey of life. Now these paths are literally the road to our future, I know - epic cliché- but it’s so true. When they tell you to think about each and every decision before you make it, they’re actually serious. Thinking is your most valuable, admirable trait.. I advise you to use it. Now, about the title. The path I’d like to chose for my future is filled with people who have made it their job to tell me “no.” In fact, there is always going to be that person telling you you’ll never be able to do what you wish, ignore them and any stereotypes involved in your aspirations. The people and stereotypes are completely irrelevant, half of the time the person telling you these things wishes they had the courage to do what you’re doing.
My parents are those people that will always be there for me, telling me in their own special way that I can and will accomplish whatever it is I’d like to. Even if it isn’t spoken, and they’re saying the opposite, the truth is in their eyes. You know what they say, the eyes are the windows to your soul. What I’m trying to say, is that for those thousands that are going to tell you no, there’s always at least one that’s going to tell you to go for it, and fight so incredibly hard to get there. The one that acts as your cheerleader is the one you should be listening to. Always keep that positive outlook on your life, and always do what you want, and what you feel is right in your heart. I don’t care if they say your heart doesn’t make the decisions, they’re wrong. Your heart leads you through and through, each and every day, telling you what you want, and what’s right for you. Listen, because it’ll always be on your side.

change.

I believe sometimes we all get a little too set in our ways, and we may not be open enough to change. With writing, sometimes you need a new approach, or a different way to go about things.. and life is the same.

Approaches. Usually when you make an approach, it’s something new, something significant or small, but either way, you’re making a change. How we make them, and how they’re received. These two factors can change everything. If you don’t go about things in the right way, or you jump to conclusions, the problem you may have been trying to sort out is only going to get bigger. Take your time, wait for what it is you’re trying to express to become clear in your mind before speaking out. Sit back and observe. The key word for all of this, is think. Wait it out, it pays in the end.
Doing something you never knew or thought you could, and doing it successfully, is so gratifying. How do you know what the right thing to do is? You don’t. You have to look inside your own soul and really search out the reasons for your endeavors. Why did you choose this path or make this decision? Only you may know, and if you don’t, but you do it anyway - you always knew it was the right choice in your heart.
Change is an amazing power that you possess. It is something that keeps life fresh and interesting, confusing and wonderful. Change is not something to be feared, but embraced. It doesn’t have to be a bad thing; great changes happen everyday. Don’t be afraid to try something new, adopt a new style or switch up your attitude from time to time.
Keep people guessing, predictability isn’t what we’re aiming for.
Just recently I had to choose my own path. I had absolutely no idea what to expect, or what I was getting into, but you do it anyways, because change is great, and being comfortable with change is what makes successful people.
Luckily, I have an on-going love affair with change.
Sometimes you’re anxious, sometimes you’re worried and wondering, “Is this really the best choice for me”? You play this game, back and forth, leaving yourself confused with what you really want. But not once do you do anything about it.
You know.
You know what you are doing was the beneficial route for yourself, the one you were always meant to take.
The thing is though, knowing you’re right doesn’t always make it any easier.
In fact, many times, doing the best and right thing is incredibly hard.
If it were easy, more people would be doing it.
In the end though, it pays off, and your heart was always the one that said “yes,” even as you may have told it “no.” That’s a good way to lead our lives, though. Do what your entire being thinks it should, and hope it’s what you really wanted. If it’s not, things can be easily mended and changed back,
no matter how difficult it may seem. Chances are, your ending is perfect, and now you’re off to a perfect beginning.

Being able to change and make a difference in your life that you've probably become comfortable in is a sign that you're very sure of yourself, and you know that no matter the outcome of your new endevour, you will still be the same person in the end. Many people are not okay with changes, big or small, and they become worried with the slightest mention of doing something differently than what they're used to. People can't seem to become comfortable with changing things up, and according to research, many times that's due to low self-esteem. People are so afraid of failure, and not liking the outcome, that they won't even take the chance and give change a try. But with hardwork and fevor, you really can work through these worries, and break down that taunting walls of fear so you can just go for it, and not worry because whatever new thing you've just done, may be undone just as easily.

It is possible to love change, you have to find the strength within yourself to be okay with the outcome, and then take that first step with class, grace, confidence and positivity. It's most likely so much easier than you may think it is. Don't be afraid to love change, and embrace a few mistakes here and there, because that's what makes us better human beings.

Sources:

zenhhabits.net/25-killer-actions-to-boost-your-self-confidence/

Confidence

Confidence has everything to do with who you are and how you lead your life. Those of us with it, know it, and we know the difference it makes in our lives. Those of you without it, realize it, but you may not understand why. Research shows that there are many reasons for low self-esteem: early childhood, relationships, parents, friends, teachers, weight, beauty, opinions, and about a million other things I could list off. There are so many contributing factors, things that we come up against every, single day. Some are within our control, and others we either learn to ignore, learn to live with, or allow to bring us down. Throughout every day, there will always be one person who is trying to bring you down. Whether that person be a friend, close or not, a family member, a co-worker or a complete stranger, it doesn’t matter. These people could be the reason for a bad day, or worse, lowered confidence. You have the power to either allow these people to completely take over your life, or to choose to be a bigger person, and allow their problems to control their owns lives, not yours.
I wrote an English paper on the subject a little while back, and I’m going to pull some things from it now. The effects of a low, and high, self-esteem are evident in every culture, and every place. If you take a look through your local grocery store, place of education or work, or any other place with people roaming about, you will find a large amount of populace with downcast eyes and slumped shoulders. These are both signs of an individual who is uncomfortable with possibly who they are or what they have to offer. Unfortunately, we live in a world where people are no longer interested in what it is that makes others feel good or bad about themselves. We’re surrounded by technology and eager ears and eyes, all awaiting juicy gossip and harsh words to be spread about concerning one person or the next. We live in a time with a lacking of compassion and thoughtfulness, a time when people think less about what’s coming out of their mouths and more about voicing their hurtful opinions to those willing to listen. Today’s world is a harsh one, and it’s quickly taking its toll.

Self-image is the way one views oneself. It’s the way you carry yourself, the way your chin is held high, your eyes straightforward and your shoulders tall. Having confidence is a large part of success, because having confidence in yourself means others can as well.

A person’s idea of themselves begins accumulating at an incredibly young age. As a child, you begin to hear comments; comments that most don’t realize you understand, but you essentially comprehend just fine. Parents, teachers and peers begin noticing things like beauty, IQ, race, gender, and even weight.

Speaking without thinking could quite possibly be the worst attribute of any society. Having little or no confidence leads to you constantly questioning yourself, and asking if what others are saying is true. Constantly pestering yourself with hurtful thoughts eventually leads to you believing the untrue classifications that others are slowing pushing into your head.

Sharing your thoughts and feelings with those that are going through the same types of issues may form a basis off of which you can build up your confidence level, as well as a friendship.

There are many ways to go about trying to improve your thoughts about yourself. A solution that is proposed often is thinking positive and maintaining a happy, "the glass is half full" type of outlook on life. The way a person views the world has everything to do with the way he or she feels on the inside. Another possible solution is taking a class on confidence and poise. These classes focus on teaching you specifics about how to gain confidence and how to perfectly carry yourself. Great posture is another part of confidence; it’s the image you project when you walk in the room, the ultimate first impression. The way you carry yourself tells a person a lot about you. The spiteful people will see your head down and shoulders low, and this will be an instant signal that you are an easy target - someone that they can easily bring down because you’re going to allow them to, and as a result, they’re going to feel better about themselves. Focusing on and fixing your posture will instantly make you appear a confident, happier and stronger person. These are temporary solutions that with a little work can change the course of your life and inflict a positive outcome on your world. Having confidence takes constant effort, but it is attainable. Learning how to accept and love yourself for who you are is the beginning of others following suit.

Self-image is one of the largest challenges primarily faced by today’s youth and adults. Having a positive outlook has provided people with something good to focus on and think about, rather than contemplating the bad and the negative parts of their day. Poise and confidence classes have also proven effective. The skills and teachings are taught in class and then carried out into the ”real world” where they are hopefully demonstrated daily by the students and passed on to others wondering the secret to such a divine, articulate and sure person.

My solutions to the issue may be to create a list of attainable goals and dates by which they are to be completed. While you would have to be a very self-motivated person to complete this task, it seems that it may make a positive effect if someone does, in fact, follow through. Setting goals gives you something to work towards, focus on, and fight for. Not to mention, something to look forward to.

Goals and deadlines aren’t something to be feared, they’re something to drive you to work harder and push past life’s difficulties so you come out on top.

Another solution is to stop comparing ourselves to other people. Whether it’s your parents, siblings, friends, popular celebrities or anyone else, we all need to stop evaluating the things that are alike and different. We are all different people, with individual traits, passions and qualities. Some things come easier for others, and we all need to find those few things that are ours. There are always one or two skills that an individual is really skilled at, and whether it takes a week or a lifetime to figure it out, the expertise is always there, waiting to be found out.

Lastly, and most importantly in my eyes, is learning how to smile and laugh. A smile is one of the best things a person has to offer. It’s beautiful and infectious. An honest smile fills you with a happiness on the inside, and pleasantness on the outside. It projects a light to the rest of the world, and gives you the ability to brighten up others lives just by the quick twitch of your lips. A hearty laugh is another contagious tone. Laughing is healthy. It’s a great thing to be able to laugh, and not exercising one’s right to it, should be a crime. Smiling and laughing are two things that are guaranteed to make you happy in an instant, and confidence won’t be trailing far behind.

Sources:
Rogers, T.B., Kuiper, N.A., Kirker, W.S. “Self-Reference and the Encodings of Personal Information,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology (1977): 35, 677-688.

Midwest Center for Stress and Anxiety, Effects of Low Self-Esteem, http://www.stresscenter.com/mwc/depression-causes/effects-of-low-self-esteem.html.

The Cleveland Clinic Foundation, Fostering a Positive Self-Image, http://my.clevelandclinic.org/healthy_living/mental_health/hic_fostering_a_positive_self-image.aspx.

 Mayo Clinic Staff, Self-esteem: Boost your self-image with these 5 steps, http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/self-esteem/MH00129

Perera, Karl, Self Image - what does it mean?, http://www.more-selfesteem.com/selfimage.htm

Jeanty, Jacquelyn, The Effects of Low Self-Esteem in Children, http://www.ehow.com/about_5389685_effects-low-selfesteem-children.html

Albo, Bonny, Low Self Esteem and How It Affects Dating Relationships, http://dating.about.com/od/confidenceselfesteem/qt/lowselfesteem.htm

McCullough, Ashbridge, Pegg, The Effect of Self-Esteem, Family Structure, Locus of Control, and Career Goals on Adolescent Leadership Behavior, http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m2248/is_n115_v29/ai_16423322/.

Perera, Karl, "The Web's Premier Source of Information on Self Esteem," http://www.more-selfesteem.com/

Happiness.

Happiness isn't just something that you can make up. It's not something you can fake, and it isn't an emotion that's easily passed across the face throughout the day as an effortless smile.
It's an emotion that resides deep within your heart and within the visible depths of your eyes.

Happiness is something that radiates within you. It's something that you feel to the ends of your toes, shooting out your fingertips, and passing through your eyes to every person you look at throughout the day. Happiness is not something that you can fake, it's something you can achieve. I stress that you have the control. You decide how you want to feel each day. You want to be dramatic? You will be dramatic! You want to be angry? You're guaranteed to have everything go wrong. But, if you want to be happy, and have a great day with sunshine and vivid smiles, you will wake up with positivity, and end your day with a smile. Each day is about searching for something new and exciting, it's about finding something wonderful, and letting it spread and fester its way into everything else in your day. Happiness is milking every little great thing for all that it's worth, and finding something else to keep that smile on your face, something simple, something perfect, something amazing.

Something new. Or old. Whichever makes you smile.

Speaking thoughts of happiness and sharing them with others isn't what makes you happy if it's not a true statement. You have to feel it, and believe it, for you to actually find it within yourself. Telling yourself you're happy isn't what makes it true, telling others your happy doesn't actually make you any happier. You have to live it, and see it. Just keep working, and find your balance, because once you've found true happiness...

you'll never let it go again.

And that's why I'm starting from the beginning: What exactly is it that leads to this elation that we all wish to feel? I believe it's confidence. Confidence affects everything. It's one of those things that will never cease to amaze you. The power of confidence is one so strong, that if you truly realize it, and acknowledge its significance, you'll have something more than most people in this world will ever dream of; you will have the power to be happy, and bear a contagious smile on your face that will have all the others glowing around you. Not only will you have the ability to be comfortable with and proud of yourself, but you will also be able to make others feel this way as well.

And that is something that will brighten any person's day.